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Silent Admirer
You like her, but how do you let her know?

You love this person, you are attracted to his or her silent, strong self or even their effervescent personality, but don't know how to approach. Here, we tell you how:

You are the quintessential silent admirer, who has never rustled up the guts to approach the person you admire, and are scared that s/he would stonewall you. One of the commonest problems faced by most of us is how to let a person know you have deeper feelings.

Here are ways you can figure it out for yourself or let them know.

  • Start A Conversation: The simplest thing to do, and one that will make it less embarrassing, is to start a conversation. How well s/he responds to you will be a good indication of whether the admiration is mutual.

    The next step: do things together. Something like studying or asking for their help for your next project or maybe take a quick lunch bite together. If s/he is willing to come out easily, these times together could lead to a closer relationship. Just work on getting the person you admire to spend more time with you. Later, you might not even have to spell it out; things might just fall in place.

  • Write a letter: When's the last time you picked up a pen and paper, and actually wrote a letter to the one you admire, or the one you are trying to attract? Sending email messages is cool, but there's nothing like penning a letter to deliver that personal touch. If you're trying to woo a woman, but words fail you every time you bump into her, perhaps you should try sending her a letter.

    In everyday conversation, you rarely have the opportunity to choose just the right word, place it in the right context, mull over it, or rephrase it. Personalise your letters and be careful about what you write. Try to be original. It doesn't have to be something very intellectual or poetic, but avoid using clich?s. If you're not much of a writer, just keep it simple. Be honest; say something uncomplicated, yet romantic, complimenting her on some thing you genuinely find attractive. Don't go overboard, it doesn't work.

  • Ask him or her out on a date: It is very essential to pass on positive vibes on your first date. To begin with, do not stammer or stutter when you are asking out your date. Even if you are nervous as hell, be cool, calm and composed. Remember that he or she is not going to eat you up for showing interest. The way you approach your date is a direct reflection on you, so remember it is essential to make the first move the right one.

    How do you figure out if a man or woman likes you? S/he laughs at your jokes that are not very funny. Or pays attention to even your boring stories and the most exaggerated ones.

    If you are friends:

    You've been around with this girl or guy for years now. Both of you have shared each other's innermost secrets, and there's little that each doesn't know about the other. The two of you are the best of friends and you realise that you want to spend the rest of your life with him or her. But you don't know how to say it, for the fear of losing the friendship.

    The first thing you need to remember is that s/ he still thinks of you as a best friend and to that extent takes your presence for granted. Remember too that s/he is used to seeing you in one predictable manner. Step in front of the mirror and take a good look at yourself. Maybe it's time to shed some fat or put on some muscles, change that hairstyle. the bottom line is that your best pal has to see you in a different avatar.

    Stay away from each other for a few days. And then suddenly drop in on him or her with your new look. Try hinting that the two of you could be more than friends. If you're lucky, your friend too may realise that the two of you have a future ahead --- as lovers.
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